Vänta nu

Jag antar att det i nästan alla vuxna parrelationer finns ett element av att förhandla om olika uppgifter i hushållet. ”Om du tar disken så tar jag tvätten”, till exempel. Jag antar också att det är ganska normalt att den ena partnern i en relation ofta är lite mer retoriskt skicklig än den andra, och därför kan vinna vissa fördelar i dessa diskussioner genom att snacka sig till de enklare/lättare/mindre tråkiga uppgifterna genom att få dem att FRAMSTÅ som tyngre/svårare/skittråkiga. Jag förmodar att detta kanske blir lite extra tydligt när man skaffar barn ihop. Den part i relationen som är en lite bättre förhandlare kommer helt enkelt ha större möjligheter att under fördelningen av blöjbyten, läggningar och sovmorgnar skaffa sig själv en högre växelkurs i tjänstesamhället.

Jag förutsätter som sagt att det är ganska vanligt, eller åtminstone inte helt ovanligt. Och som alla som har läst den här bloggen någon gång över huvud taget är väl medvetna om vid det här laget är det av min fru och mig inte direkt jag som är den bättre förhandlaren. Jag visste bara som exempel fram tills väldigt nyligen inte att man kunde pruta när man köpte bil, jag förutsatte att det var som att försöka pruta på Ica. Sedan fick jag reda på att det går att pruta på Ica och sedan dess har jag haft ont i bröstet och domningar i vänstersidan av kroppen. Min fru, däremot, råkar händelsevis och olyckligtvis vara ganska skicklig som säljare såväl som köpare. ”Men kan inte du göra det, du är ju så BRA på det!” är till exempel fortfarande en framgångsrik strategi för henne åtminstone tre gånger i veckan. Och det tog mig, bara som ytterligare ett exempel, en hel sommar av vadande i plaskdammar kalla som iglooglassar i en igloo att inse att man förmodligen inte kan vara ”allergisk mot kallt vatten”. Jag har lärt mig att leva med detta. Lite för att jag inte har haft något val och lite för att jag har litat på att hon respekterat att med stor makt kommer stort ansvar. Och ganska mycket för att jag oftast inte fattar att hon har gett mig en dålig deal förrän långt efteråt. (Eftersom jag faktiskt ÄR bra på sjukt många saker och det är bara rimligt att någon IBLAND talar om det för mig!)

Så jag  kommer inte med anklagelser här. Verkligen inte.

Jag säger bara att det var alltså fyra barn i vårt kök, och någon av dem öppnade diskmaskinen medan den var igång och det borde inte ha varit ett problem eftersom den borde ha stängt av sig själv, men sen hände något som barnen själva hade lite varierande vittnesversioner angående, och hur som helst så var det vatten över hela golvet när alla vuxna kom dit. Och tre av barnen befann sig i vattnet. Och någon av dem hade hittat ett helt paket knäckebröd som hen omsorgsfullt finfördelat över vattenytan och rört ihop till en jämn smet av spackelkonsistens och sedan penslat på alla stolar samt åtminstone ett annat barn och låtit torka.

Alltså.

Jag säger nu inte att min fru och övriga vuxna LURADE mig här. Jag säger inte att de utnyttjade min GODTROGENHET eller så.

Men min fru suckade alltså och sa ”okej, älskling, om du bara torkar upp och gör rent här så får väl vi andra…(djup suck)…ta tag i det värsta och gå och sätta iPaden på laddning då”.

Och jag känner faktiskt att det var lite över gränsen.

Jag är en vuxen man som i vissa kretsar är väl respekterad. Eller åtminstone respekterad. Eller åtminstone…ja…jag besitter åtminstone grundläggande kunskaper i en sorts hantverk. Och jag är medelintelligent. Lite beroende på medlet. Eller det finns i alla fall människor därute som minsann skulle tänka sig för både en och två gånger innan de försökte lura mig. Kanske inte jättemånga, men nästan helt säkert några stycken. Kanske inte två gånger, men eventuellt en. Och jag känner faktiskt att det här var lite över gränsen!

Eller kanske inte över gränsen då. Jag säger inte att jag inte i början själv kände att det var jag som hade vunnit förhandlingen, för det gjorde jag. För hon sålde verkligen in det så att det där med iPaden lät svinjobbigt. Jag hade till och med nästan dåligt samvete. Men nu har de varit borta i 20 minuter och jag ska inte ljuga för er: Nu börjar jag bli tveksam.

Och sen sa barnen att om jag gjorde det här så lovade de att äta upp all sin glass i ett annat rum.

Det verkade rättvist just då.

Jag tänker fan aldrig köpa en bil av någon i den här familjen.

121 kommentarer

  2. Jag har sluppit laga många middagar för jag har med övertygande tonfall sagt till min sambo; ”Det är ju DIN rätt…”

  3. Men vad i helv… JAG HAR BLIVIT LURAD! Och jag som trodde jag var PROFFS på laga mat, byta däck, klippa gräsmattan, rengöra avloppet i duschen, tömma hängrännorna på skräp, byta dammsugarpåse, servera frukost på sängen, åka till återvinningsstationen osv.

    Hela mitt liv är en lögn! ?

  4. WWFBD om du gjort det hela ditt liv så är du förmodligen proffs nu även om du inte var det från början!

  5. Det finns köldallergi. Och värmeallergi, det senare vet jag av personlig erfarenhet. Det är jättejobbigt.
    Sen att jag inte tror att din fru är drabbad av det är en helt annan sak. 🙂

  7. Hörru Backman!
    Är det inte dags att du drar igång en sportblogg som komplement till den här familjekrönikan?
    Inte för att det är tråkigt med blöjor, leksaker och fruar men… ärligt talat; NHL startar snart, Champions League dito, Premier League har startat och Allsvenskan går mot sin upplösning som någon annan jämrans deckare.

    Sedan vet jag att du har mystiska böjelser mot sån där sport som de tittar på i amerikanska tv-serier, men det kan ju vara bra som kontrast (observera att jag inte skrev ”till riktig sport”, för jag är mycket frisinnad nämligen).

    Så greppa en skrivmaskin, ställ undan den och kör igång ordbehandlaren så det ryker som ett Stockholmsderby i fotboll.

    Allvarligt talat; jag minns de sporttexter du producerade under den där lilla perioden som du hade det i ditt uppdrag och tror du skulle vara en grym röst i sportfåne… eh… sportentusiasternas sfär.

    Pax Vobiscum,

    Derfel

  9. Hur skulle det kunna vara jobbigt att ladda en i-pad? Fredrik du måste skärpa dig och inse att du fastnar med värsta skitgörat!! Kom igen. ? Hade du inga syskon under din uppväxt som du kunde förhandla med om vilka sysslor som skulle göras?

  10. Min sambo är grym på att laga mat. Och tvätta. Och vika kläder. Och grilla. Och eftersom han är så bra på det så tar jag dom jobbiga uppgifterna som att titta på Pippi, bygga lego och blåsa såpbubblor. Helt rättvist.

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