Se hela bilden

För att få hela historien klar här så måste vi möjligen börja med att konstatera att min vän N och jag bytte kontor för ett litet tag sedan, och jag har inte riktigt kommit i ordning än. Med att packa upp flyttlådorna och sådär, alltså. Det är inget konstigt. Alla som har flyttat vet att det kan ta ett litet tag. Man måste bo in sig lite, känna sig fram. Dessutom har jag faktiskt ett jobb. Eller en sorts jobb. Och ibland måste jag göra jobbgrejer. Eller jag ”måste” kanske inte, men ibland vill jag göra jobbgrejer. Eller så vill jag bara inte packa upp lådor och då kanske jag föredrar jobbgrejer. Det är i alla fall normalt. Ett litet tag. Det är möjligen relevant att ”ett litet tag” nu börjar närma sig ett år eller så, men jag har träffat flera psykologer som har sagt att jag har svårt att hantera förändringar så det är faktiskt viktigt att respektera att jag har en långsam process när det gäller sådana här saker.

Så för att sammanfatta ser väl min vän N:s halva av kontoret som vanligt så välstädat ut att det skulle kunna diagnostiseras med åtminstone fyra olika syndrom. Och min halva ser mer ut som om kontoret har fått inbrott av en arg björn med kaustiksoda i ögonen. Och min vän N och jag bråkar ganska mycket om det. Eller bråkar och ”bråkar”, han mumlar ibland i telefonen till någon som jag inte riktigt vet vem det är men misstänker är hans fru att flyttlådshögarna kommer komma väl till pass när han ska ”gömma liket” och det är lite oklart om det är mitt eller någon annans lik men det känns som en pik.

Och det är kanske en lite lång inledning till att säga att den PR-ansvariga personen på mitt bokförlag ringde mig imorse för att säga att det engelska bokförlaget som ger ut mina böcker (i England, det har visat sig att det är huvudsakligen där engelska bokförlag vill ge ut böcker) ville att jag skulle göra en intervju om mina böcker idag, på engelska, med en engelsk journalist, på Skype.

Men jag vill försvara den långa inledningen om kontoret med att den faktiskt utgör lite bakgrund för hela historien eftersom kontoret visade sig utgöra bakgrund för mig när jag skulle använda Skype.

Och, ja, allra först ska det kanske sägas att jag inte hade Skypes. Jag har aldrig använt det. Så jag frågade min vän N var man fick tag i Skype. Det är möjligt att jag ställde frågan lite med tonen som man kanske skulle använda om man frågade en tonåring om tonåringen händelsevis vet var man skulle kunna ”tjacka hasch” och man försökte låta cool och använde fel sje-ljud i ”hasch”. Jag upplevde i alla fall att min vän N:s himlande med ögonen var ungefär detsamma som man skulle kunna förvänta sig i motsvarande situation.

Det gick att ladda hem Skype från internet, visade det sig. Han kunde bara ha sagt det.

Så jag laddade hem Skype.

Det gick inte jättebra, det kan vi väl konstatera med en gång. Så jag fick ringa den PR-ansvariga på mitt bokförlag igen och fråga om vi inte kunde göra intervju över en helt vanlig telefon istället. Med ljud och ingen bild. Som Gud avsåg att intervjuer skulle göras. Så att man slipper fixa håret och sånt skit. Men det gick verkligen inte alls för sig, sa den PR-ansvariga på mitt bokförlag. Det var tvunget att vara Skype, med bild och skit, för skiten skulle spelas in och användas i någon sorts…ja, vad det nu var. Jag lyssnade möjligtvis inte helt och hållet uppmärksamt eftersom jag försökte installera Skype. Och sen ägnade jag ytterligare 45 minuter åt att försöka installera Skype. Och sen gav min vän N upp och installerade det åt mig. Det tog 11 sekunder blankt. Och sen ringde jag upp den PR-ansvariga på mitt bokförlag, på SKYPE, och skulle berätta att nu var allting klart, men då såg hon inte mig, för min videofunktion funkade inte. Så då fick min vän N ägna 45 minuter åt att försöka komma på varför den inte funkade. Och sen gav min vän N upp och ringde sin fru, och då föreslog hon att han skulle göra några grejer som han redan hade gjort, tydligen. Och när han sa det föreslog hon att han skulle testa att ”starta om datorn”. Och då gjorde han det. Och sen funkade videofunktionen.

Så då ringde jag upp den PR-ansvariga på mitt bokförlag, och då såg hon mig. Och i bakgrunden såg hon min halva av kontoret. Och den såg ut ungefär så här:

IMG_3262

För jag har liksom inte riktigt kommit i ordning än. Det är en process.

Och det visade sig då att den PR-ansvariga på mitt bokförlag har ett otroligt begränsat tålamod med processer. Så hon började skälla på mig om att så där kan det för i ända in i fula ord inte se ut när man blir Skype-intervjuad av folk i England. Och sen krävde hon att jag skulle vända hela mitt mitt skrivbord och flytta min stol så att jag hade fönstret som bakgrund istället. Så jag gjorde det.

Det tog ungefär 45 minuter, eftersom det stod en del grejer i vägen för skrivbordet. Sladdar och skrivmaskiner och sådär. Och när jag äntligen var färdig med det såg bakgrunden för Skype-intervjun ut så här:

IMG_3265

Medan resten av min halva av kontoret såg ut så här:

IMG_3266

Och sen satt jag med mitt Skype och väntade på att England skulle ringa. Och det gjorde inte England. Och jag väntade och det hjälpte inte. Så till sist ringde jag den PR-ansvariga på mitt bokförlag och frågade om jag hade gjort något fel med Skypegrejen. För jag hade liksom fixat håret och allting. Med hårvårdsprodukter. Jag var fan redo.

Och då sa den PR-ansvariga på mitt bokförlag att den engelska journalisten som skulle göra intervjun inte kunde hitta sin webbkamera. Så vi skulle göra intervjun utan videofunktion istället.

Och sen visade det sig att den engelska journalisten inte fick sitt Skype att funka över huvud taget.

Så vi gjorde hela intervjun i telefon istället.

Min vän N har låst kontorsdörren utifrån nu och vägrar öppna innan jag har städat. Så om någon av er har vägarna förbi mina barns förskola kan ni kanske sticka in huvudet och säga att jag eventuellt blir lite sen.

Och att det är Englands fel.

228 kommentarer

  2. Man kan inte lita på engelsmän.
    Läste senast igår att vissa hade tältat för att få se den nyfödda prinsessan.
    Detta när varje frisk människa vet om att tälta gör man endast för att slippa nyfödda barn och allt vad de medför…

  3. Enda bloggen jag följer, enda bloggen värd å följa. Vet inte hur många år du lyst upp dagarna, och hur många gånger jag känt igen mig 😀

  4. Jag orkar inte… hahaha… Du är fantastisk.. och bra jobbat med blogguppdateringarna… Jag fick lite ont i magen och var orolig att du skulle uppdatera typ en gång i veckan, det lät lite så i sista inlägget på café.. nu börjar jag känna lite trygghet igen..

    Och så skrivmaskinerna ???

  5. Alltså du HAR verkligen så många skrivmaskiner som du (inte) säger! Coolt 😀 Jag trodde det var ett sånt där ”jag säger att jag legat med tre personer men det fattar ju alla att du ska dela den siffran på tre”-fenomen.

  9. Man skulle kunna säga att Skype har lite att jobba på. Hur lurigt ska det behöva vara, även om man är Engelsman?

  10. Jamen du…nu kan du ju börja live-blogga. Igång med kameran på datorn osså kör du bara. Bli en vlogger helt enkelt!

    Ser fram emot det: ”Backman anno 2015. Där framtiden föds”.

    Blir finfint det. Glöm inte att städa först bara.

  12. …naturligtvis efter att du fixat håret. Eller att du använder keps. Eller cowboy-hatt.

  14. Jag fick ringa förskolan igår och säga att jag skulle bli lite sen, sådär en timme eller så, eftersom jag missat tåget. Det gick fint och pedagogerna var så förstående. Men så var det första gången som jag var en timme sen också… 😛

  15. Hahaha, jag dör av skratt! Snacka om lagen av alltings jävlighet!! ???

  16. Jag som trodde skåningar ALLTID använde fel tje-ljud när de uttalar ordet ”hasch”?! ?

    För övrigt, det ser ut att vara ganska många hyllor där i bakgrunden som ännu inte är fyllda av ”en handfull” skrivmaskiner ännu. ?

  17. Wow. Har inte läst din blogg så värst länge så trodde det här med dina skrivmaskiner va ett skämt? Att du hade kanske 2 eller max 3. HUR MÅNGA KEPSAR HAR DU INTE DÅ?

  18. Ett till förslag till hemsidefröknarna är att dölja svar till poster, så man må klicka på ett + för att se dom … lite rörigt nu

  19. Se där ja! Mycket snyggare är Cafes reklamdränkta place ?
    Jag räknade till 12 stycken. Om du inte vill berätta hur många skrivmaskiner du har totalt, vänligen uppge hur många % av dem som syns på bilderna ?

  21. Fantastiskt! ?
    Jag skulle uppskatta en enkel gilla-knapp i någon form under inläggen, som alltså inte är kopplad till FB.
    Om det redan finns så syns det inte för mig som surfar på en Iphone.

  22. Åh så skönt att du fortsätter att förgylla våra liv. Jag har följt dig i 2 år och läst ikapp de övriga åren. MEN bröllopsbloggen hittar jag inte! Den måste vara underbar! Är det någon som vet om den går att få tag på?? Absolut roligaste var när du skulle tanka i USA, skrattade så tårarna rann! Tack finaste Fredrik för att du bjuder på så mycket?.
    ”Meny” är jobbig, den rullar med och är i vägen.

  23. madio: Bröllopsbloggen togs bort i samband med att VeckoRevyn bytte servrar eller vad det nu var. Så den är lost in space.

  24. Jossan: Det finns väl ett litet hjärta längst ner till höger där det står ”gillar”?

  25. jensb: Jag tror att de ”trådade” kommentarerna (vad det nu betyder) är borttagna helt nu. Om Team Trådade Kommentarer ställer till liv i kommentarsfältet angående detta får vi hitta en ny lösning.

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  28. Jag läser på en iPad mini, med IOS 8.3, och kan inte heller se gilla-hjärtat. Vad jag skulle gilla, är ju att få se i vilket skick rummet var när du blev utsläppt! 😉

  30. Du hejjar på Dallas Cowboys?!?! Cowboys?!?
    Dom har ju inte ens några rediga cheerleaders ju…. Nu blev jag besviken på dig Fredrik.

  31. @Jessica: Cowboys brukar annars anses ha NFL:s bästa cheerleaders. I dokumentären ”Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders: Making the Team” berättar flera cheerleaders från andra NFL-team att deras största mål är att komma till DCC. Så det är dit alla vill. 🙂

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