All about you

Jag var frisk. Jag vill påpeka att jag var frisk. Jag hade inte ringt sjukvårdsrådgivningen på flera dagar. Och sen blev mina barn sjuka. Jättesjuka. Jag var fortfarande frisk, men de var jättesjuka. De kanske kunde ha dött, hur skulle jag kunna avgöra det? Va? Jag har ingen läkarlegitimation. Vad som helst hade kunnat hända. Så till slut blev mitt ena barn alltså så sjukt att jag fick ringa sjukvårdsrådgivningen. För BARNETS skull. Jag ställde inte ens en enda fråga om mig. Jag var helt osjälvisk. Vardagshjälte.

Och sjukvårdsrådgivningen frågade om symtom. Och då listade jag symtomen. Barnets symtom. Jag tog inte ens upp mig själv eller grejer jag tänker på angående mina födelsemärken eller att jag ibland liksom får värmevallningar på nätterna eller att jag har börjat tappa mer ögonfransar än normalt för jag har läst på Wikipedia vad som är normalt eller NÅGONTING av det. Jag bara fokuserade på barnet. Barnet, barnet, barnet. För sån är jag, föräldern. Och då sa sjukvårdsrådgivningen att det kanske var bäst att jag tog med mitt ena barn till läkaren, för det var något om feber och vätskebrist eller vad det nu var. Så då gjorde jag det. Och där fick vi sitta i ett väntrum fullt av andra barn som också var sjuka. Och sen fick vi gå in till läkaren, i ett rum där det sitter sjuka barn hela dagarna och bara sjukar ner allting. Och sen behövde läkaren ett urinprov.

OCH MINA BARN OCH JAG HAR INTE RIKTIGT HITTA TEKNIKEN FÖR DET ÄN!

Så, ja. För att göra en lång historia kort så är båda mina barn friska nu. Och jag har 40 graders feber och kanske kommer dö och när jag ringde sjukvårdsrådgivningen, för det här är liksom deras FEL från första början, vad får man för svar då? Vad får man för sorts engagemang?

”Nä, vadå? Hur ska vi veta hur man får bort kisslukt från håret på dina underarmar?”

106 kommentarer

  1. Förstår om du blir uppgiven. Vi får helt enkelt samla ihop oss, rasa lite i grupp och döpa om dom till Sjukvårdsuppgivningen!

    Ah, just det – krya på dig! *styrkekram*

  2. Jag är sjuksköterska.
    Jag vet att det du beskriver är sant.
    Jag träffar så stackars sjuka patienter som du ideligen.
    Så säger jag inte mera om det utan gratulerar till alla välförtjänta framgångar med Ove.
    Please, säg något om när din nästa bok kommer, tack!

  3. Hahaha. Skärpning nu, Backman!

    Jag har alltid kallats ”dagiset” i min bekantskapskrets pga mitt obefintliga immunförsvar och min FANTASTISKA förmåga (superkraft) att inte bara dra till mig baciller, utan att även kultivera dem på ett ytterst professionellt sätt. Men nu känner jag faktiskt att jag ligger i lä.

    Tack. Eller nåt. Men nu kan det väl räcka fram till Sportlovet åtminstone?!

  5. Lider med dig, big-F! 🙁
    VARFÖR har man överhuvudtaget underarmshår? Totalt värdelöst och någonting som evolutionen uppenbarligen haft problem med…….men SYFTET?? Det är ju inte direkt imponerande på presumtiva honor, eller hanar för den delen, att de muskulösa underarmarna döljs i hårbeväxning….?

  7. Underarmshår har vi för att svetten från armhålorna skall samlas upp och inte rinna ner, tränga genom byxlinningen och skvalpa ner i skorna.
    Håret mellan våra båda stortår har samma funktion.

  9. Backman – ska inte urin vara bakteriedödande? Du borde blivit friskare med allt kiss på armarna 😉

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