Det är inte nödvändigtvis mitt stoltaste minne som förälder

Jag sa att han skulle gå och lägga sig. Han frågade varför. Jag borde ha varit pedagogisk. Det han egentligen ville veta var ju varför han var tvungen att gå och lägga sig först, trots att hans lillasyster fick stanna uppe. Och visst, det finns många dåliga svar när ett barn frågar varför han måste gå och lägga sig.  Och jag antar att det säkert finns några svar som är sämre än ”för att du vet för mycket!”, men jag misstänker att det inte finns JÄTTEMÅNGA svar som är sämre. Sen sa jag ”livet är hårt, jag fattar det, men din syster kan inte ens prata ordentligt än så hon kommer inte vara ett trovärdigt vittne. Jag kommer få det att se ut som en olycka.”

Och nej, inte mitt stoltaste ögonblick som förälder. Men det var en lång kväll, och min fru hade ringt och frågat om jag hade lagat mat åt barnen och jag sa att vi hade ätit spaghetti och köttfärssås trots att vi egentligen hade ätit kakmiddag. Det var inte som att jag trodde att jag skulle sopa igen spåren, jag tänkte bara att om jag hittade en body i tvättkorgen som hade fläckar på sig som skulle kunna vara spaghetti och köttfärssås till barnet som inte kan prata ordentligt så skulle jag kunna säga att det hände en liten olycka medan vi åt, och om  barnet som kan skvallra då låg och sov när deras mamma kom hem så skulle jag kanske hinna göra någon riktigt BRA föräldragrej innan alltihop kom fram dagen efter så att jag skulle kunna säga ”ja, okej, det var dåligt av mig, men kommer du ihåg när jag gjorde DEN HÄR jättebra grejen och…”.

Till mitt försvar så har min son två gosedjursfiskar i sin säng.

Han sover alltså bokstavligt med fiskarna.

Det är okej att jag säger att han ska borsta sina tänder och sedan gå direkt till sängen och göra det då.

Jag är inte en dålig förälder hela tiden.

Jag var en dålig förälder när jag gjorde det här och jag var en dålig förälder när mina barns kompisar sov över och jag erbjöd dem tusen spänn i kontanter om de lät mig sova en timme till. Och sen är det några andra tillfällen. Absolut. Men inte hela tiden.

77 kommentarer

  1. Kunde du inte lärt sonen något medan han var uppe på kvällen istället. ”Ja han fick kakor men han har också lärt sig att läsa” (tex).

  2. Fan…hade du varit min förälder hade jag varit sjukt glad. Fast…nu är ju jag äldre än dig så det hade blivit konstigt. En tidsparadox. Typ.
    Å andra sidan kan mkt här på bloggen (läs: ditt liv) kopplas till andra dimensioner än de vanliga (kanske en PLATT dimension!?) så…vem hade varit förvånad?

    Du är ett geni! Tror jag. Kanske…

  3. Varför fick jag aldrig en kakmiddag?! Jag hade varit supertyst om det!! Bara lite mutning hade räckt, halva priset typ.. Ja…500 kr… hade räckt ganska bra!

  5. Talibarnet 7 år konstaterade häromdagen:

    ”Mamma… ALLT du säger till mig tar jag till mig och sparar inom mig. Sedan kan jag använda det som vapen mot dig när jag vill bråka med dig. Livet är hååårt …eller hur mamma?”

    Jomenalltså…ser skitmycket fram emot tonåren!

  6. Asså, nu har jag läst till sid 535 på din gamla blogg på café. Det tar aldrig slut. Och nu har jag liksom hakat upp mig på det där, kan ju inte sluta nu, vet ju inte hur långt det är kvar och… Liksom, man gör bara inte så. Läser jag nåt så läser jag allt! Nåja, ville bara säga det.
    Och – de där bloggfikorna you people ägnade er åt på den gamla bloggens tid verkade ju vara himla trevligt. Synd att jag var sist i landet med att upptäcka din eminenta blogg, så att jag missade alla såna tillfällen.
    Hur som helst! Tack för många trevliga lässtunder (ca 535 st hittills då… And counting…)

  7. Man har ju läst värre saker du gjort, det här känns ju relativt milt i jämförelse. Eller hur va det, spottar man på servetten eller på barnet först?

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